Shopping with children
Shopping with children can be a frustrating experience. For some parents shopping with a hard to manage child can be a nightmare. When the child is told that he or she cannot get a certain toy, the situation can swiftly turn into a very loud and embarrassing situation.
Children need boundaries; they need structure and rules in order to be able to deal with everyday, however for some children, enforcing the rules that are set may become a battlefield of resistance. It is important to remember that saying no does not mean you are bad parent.
When a baby is born, it is very easy to give in to the urge to spoil him or her. It is not a problem when they are infants, however as they get older, and you start to say no, you may find yourself in a situation that many parents face – a screaming demon on the floor of the department store, thrashing around and turning colors until they get what they want. It is at these moments that you need to gather your strength and just simply walk away.
Tell your child that he or she will not get what they want by acting this way, and that it is unacceptable behavior. Tell him or her that you do not want to see them acting this way and simply walk around the corner of the isle. This may seem harsh, however IT WORKS!!! When they do not have your attention, and strangers are looking at them horrified, they will stop immediately.
If they do not stop, then it may be necessary to remove the child from the store. Sit him or her in the car and tell him or her that he or she will not be allowed back into the store until he or she can behave properly. If the behavior continues, simply leave the store and drive home.
Don’t think that other people in the store will judge you, because many of them have been there themselves and know exactly what you are doing. For those who don’t, they will face the same situation at one point in their lives.
It is also important that you do not lose your head in public. Children know how to push our buttons. Often times, we just give in and give them what they want just to get a little peace and quiet, and children knowing that we crave this will keep on pushing buttons until they get it what they want.
If your child is prone to this type of behavior, setting the ground rules before stepping foot in the store will forewarn them that there will be consequences to their behavior.
Tell your children that if they do not behave in the store we will leave immediately and they will not be able to go with me the next time you shop, and if they misbehave, then they go to the babysitter for the next shopping trip.
It is important that you associate the punishment with the offense. In other words, do not take their television time away for misbehaving in the store. They will probably forget what they did wrong by the time they get home anyway.
You will most likely have to remind them why they are going to the babysitter. Depending on their age, he or she will not remember what triggered you to hire a babysitter. It is important that you do not get angry when reminding them, simply tell them that their behavior was unacceptable on the last shopping trip, and that there are consequences for the choices that they make.